Q: What if I am too harsh on cranberries to make them sad?
A: It turns into blueberries.
Q: What is the difference between Election Day and Thanksgiving Day?
A: You can get turkeys on Thanksgiving. On Election Day, you can get a turkey for 4 years.
Q: Why do turkeys cross the road?
A: It was Thanksgiving and I wanted people to think of me as a chicken!
The first grade class was asked to write a paragraph titled “Thanksgiving Day.”
Little Johnny’s started by saying, “I’m thankful that I’m not a turkey.”
Q: When did the pilgrims first say “God bless America”?
A: It was the first time I heard America sneeze.
Q: If you’re selfish, what do you call Thanksgiving?
A: Thank you.
My husband does not consider the housework to be a full-time job. So on Thanksgiving I served him a raw turkey. Because revenge is best cooked cold.
Why did the farmer run the steam locomotive over the potato field on Thanksgiving?
He wanted to grow mashed potatoes.
Q: What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo?
A: You can draw your own turkey!
Q: What did baby corn say to mother corn?
A: Where’s the popcorn?
Q: What did the turkey sing on Thanksgiving?
A: God, please save my relatives.
Q. What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving?
A: Bang! quack!
Q: What turkey cuts do drummers prefer?
A: Drumsticks, or of course!
Q: What is the main ingredient of Thanksgiving Bread?
A: May flour!
Q: Where is the only place where Christmas comes before Thanksgiving?
A: In the dictionary!
Q: What is Pumpkin’s favorite sport?
A: Squash!
Q: What do you call a turkey when it rains?
A: Bad weather!
Q: What does a turkey phone sound like?
A: Wings, wings.
Q: What is the smallest unit of measure in the Pilgrim Cookbook?
A: Pilgram.
Q: How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving?
A: He was very considerate.
Q: Why do pilgrims eat candles?
A: He wanted a light snack.
Q: Why is the chef late for Thanksgiving dinner?
A: He lost his thyme.
Q: Why does the turkey sit on a tomahawk?
A: Trying to get an axe.
Q. Why do turkeys lay eggs?
A: Because if you drop it, it will break.
Q: If the fruit comes from the fruit tree, where does the turkey come from?
A: Poultry tree.
Q: What do turkeys get when they lay eggs on a hill?
A: Egg rolls.
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