Anaconda of the voice. With her chin wide open, she pulls you in. One octave at a time you surrender and cradle into the vocal network. As you hear Adele play ‘Easy on Me’, the ghostly hairs on your arms stand as if you’ve forgotten that your hair follicles have all been laser-removed.
Rumors around Adele making a comeback after six years were more about losing 100 pounds than her new album about heartbreak. There is a sense of disappointment among her followers. The assumption that weight loss abandoned all women who saw themselves visually expressed through them.
“The most brutal conversations other women have about my body,” she said in a recent interview. I wonder why she talks about her dress size in such an incredibly loud voice.
Women live in a dichotomy in which conditions and aspirations repeatedly pop into their heads. I can tell you that Adele shouldn’t be defined by weight or loss, but for the past 24 years, Scales and I have had daily meetings where the figures mocked me and ate cookies in despair. .
Lately I’ve finally lost some stubborn fat and found myself showering with compliments including ‘You’re shrunk’ from ubiquitous like a sweater accidentally thrown into the washing machine. This well-meaning cliché made me skip my steps, and I liked the way the dent in my side could almost be mistaken for a defined waist.
There are parts that judge this part to be shallow, and some of you reading this may be the same. There will also be a large section wondering what diet she went on. Perhaps we should give it a try too. Well, it’s not keto, paleo, low-calorie or low-fat. We got some weight change and life-changing tips from an 80-year-old man. I had the opportunity to interview Waheeda Rehman, and she gave me the wise advice: ‘Every time I gain a kilo, I start eating an omelette for dinner and eat it until I lose weight’. Since then I have eaten so many omelettes that I feel like even my ovaries are confused as to whether the eggs floating in my system are being produced by them or by a flock of chickens.
Ageism, sexism, feminism, and our own arguments are all weapons we use frequently. It’s bad enough that we function within a patriarchal framework, but it’s odd that women often judge each other the most. A book about Uday Kotak features a snippet of how Nykaa founder Falguni Nayar, who recently became India’s richest self-made female billionaire after a successful IPO, wanted to quit her job and join her husband when she moved to London. Then New York. Instead, Uday Kotak continued to ask her to start an office in the city. Instead of applauding her business acumen, people are arguing about what harms feminism as she wants to quit her job and follow her husband.
Marriage is not a public limited company where you have to sell stock and return money to investors. But they still seem to be everyone’s business, not yours. If you’ve been paying attention to the comments I throw in my own way, you either have to get a divorce because you and your partner have different opinions on a number of issues, or you’ll have to wear a sari and gyrette on Tip Tip Barsa Pani every weekend to stay married.
On a boring afternoon, I heeded the latter suggestion and decided to make a video, playing the iconic song myself. Unfortunately, I ended up singing this to my plants with a can of water, not to the one who everyone seems to serenade. This has nothing to do with not wanting to be objectified, it has to do with the existential collapse of my brain while doing hip rolls and singing keys. As I explained in the video, I’m just the kind of person who starts to worry about things like:
1. Now you need to send this sari to the laundromat. Like all saris worn to wedding ceremonies, you can’t just hang them.
2. Damn it! How do you know when to sing and when to stop singing because if you get water in your ear you won’t be able to hear the music?
3. Your period is scheduled for the next day. I hope it doesn’t plan to catch a special early bird to visit me now.
4. How embarrassing for my kids to see me doing all this on my balcony.
5. If you wear wet clothes for a long time, you are very likely to get thrush and other fungal infections!
6. My back is going to kill me. It is recommended to apply IOdex tonight.
7. And of course the best part is that no one pays for me!
Once you’ve missed enough to fall off a cliff, we’re back to the tricky landscape of choosing a life partner. As everyone around the world and especially all the stuffy people know, Malala recently married Asser Malik. But besides blessings, Malala showered with terms such as hypocrite and anti-feminist. All because she said this in a previous interview. “I still don’t understand why people have to get married. If you want to have someone in your life… Why can’t it be a partnership?” Meanwhile, if you’ve been shot in the head for defending another woman, I wonder if taking the bare minimum could change your mind.
I think Malala with Adele said, ‘I was still a child. Didn’t get a chance to feel the world around me. I didn’t have time to choose. what I choose to do. So come to me easily.’
Whether you’re an icon like this woman, or a large family of 22 who’s the only person following you on Instagram, you’ll all be judged. If you are single, it is better to get married. Married, then where are the children? Working women, aren’t you neglecting your children? If you don’t work, you set a bad example for the same guys. Do you agree with your husband? You are such a doormat! And if you don’t agree, why are you still with him? That line on your forehead makes you look like Daddy Amma! Are you using botox to get rid of wrinkles? How fake! And, like Malala, a change of heart should be a natural progression in the desire to grow old and wise. Then you are clearly a scammer.
It’s almost ridiculous that no matter what you choose, there are always people who say your choices aren’t good enough. Tragically, we start to believe all these voices after hearing them over and over. So for change, we listen to Adele and easily reach out to each other, especially to ourselves.
disclaimer
The views expressed above are those of the authors themselves.
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